| Wednesday, June 24, 2009 |
| It's been a while |
I miss writing with feelings (naks!) hehe.
Who was it that said: "I have a lot of dreams I want to reach. That’s why I want to heal myself. People say that keeping a journal is therapeutic. Especially for people like me who are used to keeping things to themselves. Hence the journal... i want to talk about my life, my hurts, my dreams... i want to understand myself better."
Ay ako pala :)
Four years ago, on 28 July 2004, in fact, I started my first blog/journal. My very first post was aptly entitled "Where do I Begin?" Since then, I wrote everything from my most heart-wrenching experiences (at least for me) to some sickeningly hopelessly romantic-slash-sawi stuff (now that I look at it!) to something completely mundane.
It began as a way of expressing myself, to an avenue of meeting people, to a [grammar] contest with myself, to a mockery. Time passed and I sometimes found myself writing for an audience: writing what was entertaining; censoring what I had to say so as not to offend anyone; stopping my thoughts in their tracks if it won't pass off as interesting stuff. As much as I hate to admit it, I went through a phase of experiencing things and secretly classifying how 'blog-worthy' they are.
Then I hit a wall. After some time, I could hardly think of anything to write anymore. A lot of factors contributed to this - family and friends being a large part of it (tenenenen!) But most importantly, I found that I can move on, and instead of writing - I chose to live. Now, I just experience things, and tell people about it. Of course, dinners, coffees, booze and spam emails certainly helped :)
And why am I saying this now? wala lang, masama ba? :) I happen to be in a good mood... and I also happen to be petiks hehe. This is me, talking to myself. This is me, telling myself its ok not to write sometimes, most of the time, or anymore, if I choose so. And this is me, thanking God and the wonderful people and things in my life that have made me what I am today. mwah! hehe *soooobrang cheeesy!* =D |
posted by Tami @ 11:47 AM
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| Wednesday, March 25, 2009 |
| Happy ending |
I reached for that star.
With tears in my eyes, I did.
I didn't get it.
But at least I now know what its like to stretch my arms
So next time, I can reach even further.
Toink! ^_^
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| posted by Tami @ 7:09 AM
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| Friday, March 20, 2009 |
| Hyper - vent - ilating |
Never thought the day would come... mahirap pala sya. I can barely concentrate on anything. My thoughts keep jumping from one thing to another. Everything sounds loud, and I can hardly keep still. Paano... I am hyper. I just drank one cup of coffe latte (is that how you call it?) 1 cup, from our free Nestle vendo; I need to vent something out, which I already did; Naloka akew; and I am elated ergo "ilating" - pinilit talaga. Kasi excited ako. Ilang oras na lang... glug glug glug na! =D Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing. Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing. Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing Boing boing boing boing. Boing boing boing boing Oh that was just me.... bouncing off the walls. =D |
| posted by Tami @ 12:31 PM
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| Thursday, March 12, 2009 |
| The M7 Saga |
If I ever needed vindication for the Saguijo and Oktoberfest incidents, Saturday, 7 March 2009 would have been it. It was a treat - not only for the ears but also for the eyes! =P It was even better than the 'ito-na-yata-ang-pinaka-successful-na-concert-na-napuntahan-ko' 2009 Wednesday UP fair (Disclaimer: among the limited 'budget' concerts na napuntahan ko.)
Chapter 1: I think I'm falling for you.
Red Jumpsuit Apparatus Asia tour, 6.00 pm, Glorietta Atrium
Need I say more? Gusto ko na nga maging Koala diba? =P Ok, hindi ako magpapaka-plastic, and I will admit I only knew about RJA last year. Syempre, Your Guardian Angel and Cat & Mouse ang una kong narinig. Yun din ang few of the songs na pinagpapractice-san ko nung nagaral ako mag-gitara (pano mabagal at 4-5 chords lang! hehe). Then a friend's friend just sent me a few more mp3s.
Anyway, when I found out last week that RJA was coming to Manila, I couldn't contain my excitement. I even initially planned to watch them at Market Market on 6 Mar before going to a friend's bday party, and then watch them again on 7 Mar with Ka' Dizon, before going to Eheads. Turned out I couldn't go on 6 Mar anymore, so I promised myself by hook or by crook I have to see them on the 7th! Kahit maglakad ako to MOA dahil sa traffic, no one can stop me!
Come Friday, I arrived at Glorietta for an early dinner and then RJA came on stage. All I could think of was da hair... vocal chords... da hair... vocal chords... da hair... da hair... hahah I swear. They played about 10 songs for a good hour. Of course, hindi mawawala ang Your Guardian Angel and Cat & Mouse, which Ronnie said 'they don't usually play but will do so, especially for the Phils.' (Hmmm i bet you say that to all the cities you go to!)
Punong-puno yung atrium, you could hardly imagine it was just a mall tour. We were standing to one corner with the play ground blocking most of the stage. So imagine my delight when the couple beside us moved out. The girl was sitting on a table top behind which there were some security guys, I think. Sabi nila pwede rin ako maupo dun, so I did and got a really good view of RJA!
After 5 minutes though, someone tapped me on the shoulder. Apparently, bawal pala yun upuan! When I looked again, all the guys I thought were from security were no longer there. In my confusion, e napababa ako ng di oras. I didn't anticipate that the table was so high, even for me (and my 3-inch shoes) so I crashed straight into the guy in front of me. Ka' Dizon looked alarmed as she tried to hold me steady but the damage was done - the guy looked like 'Ate, huwag po!' while the two other people who saw me fall had 'tsansing, tsansing!' in their eyes.
Darn. Pero keber. Kahit cute yung nabunggo ko, mas cute si Ronnie sa kanya! I didn't want to miss much of the concert so I just apologized and watched RJA again pero sa totoo lang, tawa pa rin kami ng tawa ni Ktin.
It was a great show, and the energy level of RJA - as well as the crowd - was amazing. The LCD screen was a savior.
+++++
Chapter 2: Pumasok sa Bronze, lumabas sa Silver.
Eheads The Final Set, 8.00 pm, MOA
An hour later, we found ourselves walking through MOA. We didn't know where the concert grounds were, so we just followed the 'Batman' type light flashing at the back.
We just entered the concert grounds when the VJs/Emcees started their introductions and plug-ins. It was 8.30 when the Eheads finally started playing! Mejo kulang sa energy at first, pero towards the end, bonnggang bonggang bongga na! =D I just don't know if mashadong malaking yung grounds or ganun lang talaga ang properties ng sound waves, kasi may speaker na nahuhuli, parang may pahabol lagi na drums.
It was my first time to hear them play live, and so I didn't know - although my friends tell me - that ganon talaga si Ely. Puro tugtog talaga and no adlibs. It was weird though because even the crowd was unresponsive at first, and just livened a bit when Marcus and Raimund took to the mic. During the second set, Ely was more lively.
At the end of the second set, Ely said goodnight but it was apparently just a ploy! They came back with another 'costume change' which is more like just changing their shirt. Towards the end, they sang Superproxy and 1 stanza of Kaleidoscope World for Francis M. I actually expected for them to spend a few moments in silence at the start of the concert to honor Francis M. But in the end, it was better what they did because it was a really moving moment.
After the third set, he really said goodbye, with matching bows and their version of a 'group hug.' People started to leave already, and so did we. Pero buti na lang matagal makalabas so nasa loob pa kami nung biglang umilaw uli yung stage! Eheads were discussing and then Ely shouted - 3 for the road!
Ang saya saya! At that point, hatak ko si Nena and hatak niya si Emkay, and we ran like hell to get as close as we can get to the stage. Nung time na yun, natanggal na yung barricade between bronze and silver so ayun automatic upgrade. hehehe
I love the fact that The Final Set was not much a concert as it was a get together of old friends. (Yes, friends kami baket? =P) You'll definitely forget that you weren't in a field with thousands of other people as Eheads experimented with reggae / acoustic (?) / lounge versions of old favorites :) In retrospect, the hype of in between adlibs was not needed because after all, people went there for the music and not merely for a performance. Eheads has been so much a part of everyone there that silences were immaterial.
Syet... lalim. Red Horse nga dyan.
After the concert, while we were meeting up with other friends, we happened to pass by the back stage area. May nagkakagulo and sumisigaw, so leaving all our poise behind, takbo na naman kami ni Ka' Dizon. Si Yael lang pala (hahah! 'lang' na lang bigla e... joke lang =P) After a while, another car came out of the backstage, this time with Ely in the passenger seat. Sayang, hindi na namin naabutan.
+++++
Anyway, to follow ang mga pictures and videos... I couldn't upload them yet huhu! Buti na lang din strategic ang locations ng mga LCD, kasi yun lang ang navideo ko! :) |
| posted by Tami @ 8:58 PM
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| Tuesday, March 10, 2009 |
| I now know what I want in life. |
I've never wanted anything this bad since.... I can't remember when! Pano ko ba gagawin ito? What steps do I have to take? I am ready to face all consequences. All I need is a chance! PLEASE give me a chance!
PLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZSSSSSSHHHHHH (with a matching growling, guttural sound)
I want to be...
A koala bear. 
(Ronnie Winter, vocalist, Red Jumpsuit Apparatus) ^_^ |
| posted by Tami @ 2:01 PM
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| Wednesday, March 04, 2009 |
| It could have been me |
She did online check-in six hours before her flight then enjoyed a nice lunch with a friend. Afterwards, she went back to the hotel, checked out and stored her luggage with the concierge. Waltzing to the shopping mall downstairs with the intent of savoring the last few moments in Singapore, she took a few photos when a glimmer caught her eye. So she walked slowly towards a small shop stand and 15 minutes later, she was four accessories richer. Finally she made her way back to the concierge and asked for a taxi to the airport. Occasionally checking her watch along the way, she was a bit worried the ride was taking too long. At last she saw the familiar airport watch tower. Once inside, she lined up at the check-in counter and confidently handed over her travel documents and the online check-in confirmation to the representative. The time was 4.40 pm. The attendant looked her over and said "You are late for check-in." In her head she thought, "Surely 45 minutes is sufficient time!" Unfazed, she waited a moment while the attendant asked for her supervisor. Once there, the supervisor irately asked "Do you know what time your flight is?" The girl said tentatively, "5.30?" "No! It's 5.10! Check-in is already closed and it’s a long walk to the gate - you won't get there in time anyway. You'll have to get the next flight out." Her enlarged eyeballs said it all. Knees shaking a bit, she asked (although she knew what the answer was) if there was an evening flight. No, they said, the next flight available was tomorrow morning; go change it at the ticket office. Mentally computing how far her remaining money could take her (what a perfect time to have intentionally left all her credit cards at home, too!) she made her way to the ticket office. Luckily the nice lady at the ticket office changed her flight without extra charges, and even allowed her to check-in her luggages for the morning's flight. Maybe her I-am-strong-but-breaking-deep-down-inside look helped but it could also be that the lady was just plain compassionate. "How wonderful and efficient!" she thought. One down, another problem to go. So she sent an SMS to her friend: "You're gonna love this…. I'm still here! Blah blah blah..." Her friend lives close by and offered to let her spend the night. "Whoohoo!" For a minute, she regretted having accepted the morning flight too soon - she should have gotten the afternoon flight out so as to spend a little bit more time in the place. Anyway, she'll just take what she can get. And so she lived happily ever after. 
All I can say is…. IT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. It could have been ME ON that darned plane that fateful Monday afternoon!!!
And this is the true-to-life story of why I went home from Singapore on a Tuesday, instead of a Monday =) +++++ In retrospect, that was REALLY embarrassing! But I am a firm believer of 'everything happens for a reason' and 'you are where you are supposed to be' (especially when it suits me hehehe!) so something good did come out of my extra night's stay: good views, good talks, good moments, all of which I needed at that time =) Tenchu to my friendly friend for saving my ass! And for feeding me that night. And for taking me to the airport the following day (buti na lang kasi kulang kulang ang barya ko pambayad ng taxi!) to make sure I got on the plane. Her loving, parting words to me, which I will remember until the day I die, was: "Langya ka, pag nakita pa kita mamayang hapon ah!!! =P" hehehe huggies-mwah, khapsy! =D |
| posted by Tami @ 5:16 AM
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| Wednesday, February 25, 2009 |
| A Return to the Freedom Fields |
In the stillness of the night,
Your heart is at peace.
Occasional headlights and streetlamps illuminate
Anonymous stars laying on the greens.
Music and giddy screams effervesce into a symphony
'Til you hear nothing but your breath upon a heart beat.
From a safe distance and a rocky bed you stare
While taking comfort in a blanket of chilly air.
On a night such as this, do your thoughts flee
As the canopy of trees open up endless possibilities.
You look to the sky and the lone star looking down at you
Seems to be within your reach.
But no one's stopping you.
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| posted by Tami @ 6:20 PM
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